Six Most Common Baby Led Feeding Questions Answered
7/12/2023
Written by Catherine Callahan, MS, CCC-SLP, CLC
When starting baby-led feeding, it’s normal to have a lot of questions, especially if you’re a first-time parent. Today we’re answering the 6 most common baby-led feeding questions and concerns.
My baby isn’t self-feeding.
You put the food out, and… nothing. Baby just looks at it, or even starts to pick it up, but then drops it or plays with it. What do you do? Start here!
Encourage mouthing. Does your baby bring their hands and toys to their mouths during play? If no, then this is the place to start. When baby is sitting or lying down, help them bring their hands and toys to their mouth. This hand to mouth movement is key. Baby needs to learn this skill, in order to be able to bring food to their mouth and eat. Once baby is actively doing this, then move on to the below.
Take baby’s favorite toy and dip it in a favorite flavor puree. Start with a small amount on the toy, and gradually increase the amount with time. As baby starts to bring toys with food to their mouth more regularly, move onto utensils.
It’s okay to play! Let baby use their hands to play with a food they love to eat, even a puree. If baby is scooping up food with their hands, help them bring it toward their mouth by supporting at the elbow.
When serving food on a spoon, preload and bring it toward baby's mouth. Wait for them to open their mouth and reach for the spoon. Hold the spoon together and bring it to baby’s mouth, then let go as baby begins holding.
When serving food in sticks, hold the food in front of your baby’s mouth and wait for baby to lean in and reach for it. Hold it together with baby. Over time, as baby starts to hold onto the food, let go and allow them to do it independently.
Remember that this takes time and practice. Don’t expect your baby to self-feed perfectly from day one. It’s okay to step away and let them explore on their own! Sit down together, eat your meal, and give baby time and space to practice.
If baby is older than 8 months and still unable to self-feed, we recommend you talk to your Pediatrician about a referral to a speech pathologist or occupational therapist for more individualized support. It is okay to ask for help!
My baby isn’t chewing.
Babies begin with a simple up and down reflexive motion of their jaw that comes under their own control between 5 and 9 months. From there, they advance to a diagonal jaw movement starting around 7 to 9 months, and later to a circular movement, which is fully developed by about 24 months. Watch for your child to increase the number of chews, size, and rhythm, and to advance from up and down to eventually a circular jaw movement by age 2.
The key to remember here is that babies learn to chew through chewing. Practice is important!
Here are THREE simple strategies to help:
Go back to mouthing
Chewing skills start with mouthing. If your baby doesn’t put teething toys or dry utensils in their mouth yet, start there. Give your baby a variety of stick-shaped teething toys and spoons to chew on daily. If baby won’t put them into their mouth on their own, help. Our goal is to place these tools between the gums or molars on the sides of baby’s mouth.
If your baby is chewing on teething toys and tools, but won’t chew food, try these strategies:
Dip stick-shaped teething tools in puree, roll tools in a soft smashable solid (like avocado or banana), or roll in crumbs of a meltable solid (only use this texture after baby is crawling) and help baby place this on the molar area for chewing.
Offer stick-shaped foods that are soft (starting after baby is sitting up) and meltable (after baby is crawling). When you offer these foods, guide baby to put them between the molars. By placing between the molar areas, your child will naturally learn to bite and chew with teeth vs. smashing with their tongue.
2. Use a mesh or silicone feeder
This is a great way to encourage biting and chewing in a way that will prevent baby from swallowing too quickly, mashing or sucking the food, or struggling with a challenging texture. Place a firmer food into the feeder, then hand it to baby for chewing practice. Silicone feeders that are more narrow in shape are preferred, as these are easier to place on the sides of the mouth. Help baby to place the feeder on the side of the mouth near the molar area. When baby chews on the side, their tongue will shift to that side, encouraging a diagonal chewing motion. We want this movement to help baby progress!
3. Model
Babies learn through imitation. When you’re eating with your baby, model chewing. Use an exaggerated motion and call attention to yourself so that baby will watch. This will encourage them to imitate those big chewing motions.
My baby is spitting food out.
Chewing and spitting out food is very common for babies. We often see babies doing this with new foods, harder to chew textures, or when they are not hungry. If it’s happening every once in a while, or for a brief period of time, it is completely normal. However, if this persists, or your child is not swallowing any foods, then further evaluation by a professional is warranted.
If your child is chewing and spitting out food, stop the behavior by changing the focus. Offer a sip of a drink, place a different food on the tray, or start a conversation to re-direct. If baby continues to do it, then end the meal. Say something like, “I can see that you are all done; all done.” Keep it neutral and avoid making a big deal about the spitting, as this can only increase the behavior (if your baby enjoys the attention they get from the reaction). I like to go with a “two strikes rule.” As described above, if your baby continues after two attempts to redirect or change things, then the meal is done.
If you notice your baby is always spitting a certain texture, make that texture easier for them to manage by chopping it smaller, cooking it down to a softer consistency, blending it, or by adding a dip or sauce to soften it.
My baby is gagging all the time.
Gagging is a normal infant reflex designed to keep them from choking. When food or another item reaches the back of baby’s tongue, that gag reflex moves it forward. We expect babies to gag when beginning to eat because they are learning to control food in their mouth and they are working to move the gag reflex back. However, if gagging is happening frequently throughout every meal, this can become a negative experience. Some babies will gag because they have an overactive or hypersensitive gag reflex, others will gag because they are behind on their chewing skills and are having difficulty controlling food in their mouth. If your baby is gagging too much, here’s what to do:
Take a step back to mouthing. Yes, here it is again; mouthing is everything! Make sure your baby is putting teething toys and utensils, even without food on them, into their mouth. Baby should be doing this all of the time. The more baby experiences texture on the tongue and inside the mouth, the better they will be prepared for food coming in. Stick shaped teething toys get further back in the mouth and help to move the gag reflex back.
Take a step back with food and offer purees. If baby is gagging with a thick puree like mashed table food, then thin that food out with a little liquid. Purees are easier to control, so this is a good place to start as baby is building a skill.
Try a food teether like a mango pit to allow baby biting practice, without large pieces coming off into the mouth.
Offer food in a silicone feeder for chewing practice, without large pieces coming into the mouth.
Remember to stay calm. When baby sees you reacting, becoming stressed or anxious, they will feel that way too.
My baby is stuffing food.
First, work on improving your child’s oral awareness (the ability to understand and feel food in their mouth, and the borders of the inside of her mouth.) Children begin to learn this through mouthing, typically by 5 to 9 months. Encourage mouthing hands, toys, and utensils during wake windows. Help your child practice by chewing on lots of teething toys in different shapes and sizes. Look for teething toys with texture, and offer a baby toothbrush for chewing as well.
While your child is working on improving oral awareness and sensation in the mouth, help them learn to take small bites by only offering just 1-2 bites on their plate at a time. It sounds simple, but most of the time, we just need to break the habit and allow baby to practice this skill. Keep the full serving of food over to the side, and add new bites to baby’s plate as they eat.
Offer foods with stronger flavors. These provide more sensation in the mouth. When a child can feel the food, they’ll be less likely to overstuff.
Practice biting with hard food teethers. Offer baby a mango pit, pineapple core, watermelon rind, corn cob with most corn removed, rib or chicken leg with cartilage and skin removed. These will only allow baby to take bites and will not permit overstuffing.
My child throws food during meals.
First, take a look at which foods your baby is throwing and when. Is your baby full and then begins throwing? Is baby throwing a food they don't like? Does baby do this when their plate is full and they’re overwhelmed? If you can get to the bottom of why this is happening, then you can solve this struggle. If you’re unsure, try a combination of methods and see what works for your baby.
Here are 4 reasons why food throwing occurs and how to help:
If your baby does not want to eat a particular food:
Give your baby a place to put the food. Use an “all done” bowl. Place a small bowl next to your child’s plate. When baby starts to throw the food, redirect them to put the food into the “all done” bowl. Verbally cue your baby, “This is the all done bowl. If you’re all done with that, put it here.” Do not push your baby to eat any of the food they have placed in this container.
2. If your baby is full:
End the meal. When your baby throws food, take that as a cue that they are done. If you don’t feel your baby is truly done yet, try giving a reminder first, “If you throw your food, that tells me you are all done. If you throw again, we will be all done.”
3. If your baby is looking for attention:
Many times babies will throw food if they are looking for attention, both positive and negative. Ignore the behavior and bring your focus to something positive your baby is doing, something else on their plate, or a new conversation. Without any attention, the food throwing should diminish over time.
4. If your baby is overwhelmed:
Try removing most of the food on the plate and offering just 2-3 simple bites. Make sure the table space around your baby is clear and free of clutter.
No matter the struggle, you are not alone in this.
If you are finding yourself overwhelmed, these challenges are impacting your baby’s health and wellness, or they are not going away, seek out a Clinical Feeding Evaluation with a Speech-Language Pathologist or Occupational Therapist. During this appointment, the professional will watch your child eat and drink, and will give your personalized recommendations and treatment plan.
Feeding challenges are common. Sometimes the simplest changes can make all the difference!
Have more questions about starting solids?
If you found this post helpful, we share more evidence-based best practices for starting solids inside our 101 before one program.
At 101 before one, we believe babies who eat Family Meals from the Start™ will be happy, healthy eaters for life. Starting solids can be intimidating, but we show you how to introduce 101 different foods to your baby before their first birthday, all through simple, easy-to-follow recipes that the whole family can enjoy.